Paralysis of Perfection
Everything has to be perfect. The lighting, time of day, just the right cup with coffee. Pens and pencils lay out in the perfect order to invoke creativity. A new fresh notebook open, prepared for the words. Handwriting has to be just so, what if I mess up, the ink needs to be the same. Maybe I’ll change to the computer- but the computer doesn’t have the right “feel” to it for the old fashioned creativity I want to bring. It’s been 15 minutes now – the light has changed the time has passed and no words are on the paper, the notebook, the screen. No words, because it wasn’t perfect. I often hear the quote:
Perfection is the enemy of Progress
*I looked online as to who wrote this, so I make sure to check my references – for the record, Winston Churchill is credited with it, though it appears the roots come from Voltaire in the 18th century.
Once again, the need to have everything perfect interrupts the flow, the words, the thoughts. Cite everything, know where it comes from, cite anything that is not your work, go and check your quotes, double check the citations, just in case something is incorrect.
Surely, I am not the only one. Twice in the past month I have had people tell me “Be Bold”. Being bold is terrifying. Being bold means moving forward when everything is not perfectly ready to go. Being bold means stepping out with the expectation that there is a net and it doesn’t have a hole in it. Doesn’t it?
Or does being bold mean that you step out knowing that failure is in fact an option and you are going to try anyway. That the potential reward is worth the risk. Maybe, it means that you step out knowing that if (and when) failure does happen, that you have the community who will help you dust off and get back up again. Maybe being bold means that we ignore the naysayers, the keyboard warriors who may criticize what we say or do, who may challenge our work and our creativity, who may (will) not like how we (I) show up, what I say or what I do. Maybe, it is quieting the internal critical voices and allowing myself to show up for myself.
Whatever direction it goes, maybe, it is a need to learn to move forward through the mess, through the confusion, through what seems to be chaos – but is just new for me. And challenge the need for perfect again and again until the negative voices drown out in the silence of peace.
